Breaking Chains: Reclaiming Your Worth Beyond the Grade
“Is he crawling yet?”
“Is she walking yet?”
“Is he talking yet?”
“What was your score on that test?”
From the moment we’re born, society starts measuring us, milestone by milestone, score by score. It’s subtle at first, but over time, these comparisons begin to shape how we see ourselves.
I often ask my college freshmen on the first day of class:
"When did you first feel like your worth was being measured by a number?"
Most of them say it started as early as first grade.
They remember being pulled out of class for reading help while their classmates did something “fun.” They recall noticing lower scores on their assignments. And from those early moments, a seed was planted, a belief that they were less than. That belief often grows silently and powerfully, following them all the way to college.
It reminds me of the story of baby elephants. When they’re young and captured, a rope is tied around their ankle to keep them from wandering. At first, they tug and pull, but eventually, they stop trying because they believe they can’t break free.
But here's the catch: those baby elephants grow into 1,000-pound giants. They're more than strong enough to snap that rope yet they don’t even try. Why? Because they’ve been conditioned to believe they can’t.
That rope? It’s a lie.
And so is the belief that your worth is determined by a score, a label, or a comparison.
You are not “less than.”
You are not behind.
You are not broken.
You are powerful. You are resilient. You’ve faced challenges that required strength, grit, and perseverance- and that makes you stronger, not weaker.
It's time to recognize the chains holding you back, those limiting beliefs that started in childhood and have lingered far too long. It's time to break them.
You were created for more.
Let’s step into it one brave, beautiful step at a time.
Your Turn: Reflection + Action
Activity: Breaking the Chain
Grab a journal or notebook.
List 3 negative beliefs you’ve held about yourself related to academics or performance. For example:
“I’m not smart enough.”
“I’ll never be good at math.”
“I always mess things up.”
For each belief, write down where you think it came from. Was it a moment in school? A comment someone made?
Now, for each one, write a truth that breaks that chain. Something like:
“I may struggle, but I am capable of learning and growing.”
“My intelligence is not defined by one subject or one test.”
“I’ve overcome hard things—I can do this too.”
Put a star next to the truth that resonates most with you. Repeat it to yourself this week. Write it on a sticky note. Say it out loud when you feel doubt creeping in.
